Tuesday 18 August 2015

Vedic Parenting Tips



Vedic Parenting Tips


Modern science of parenting is full of contradictions, every decade the researchers and social psychologists seem to come up with different approaches to parenting, you will find big shelves of bookstores full of parenting books, which often offer completely different advice on parenting.

This leads to a confusing and bewildering sense among the first time parents. especially living in cities, in nuclear families - it does not seem clear which exactly is the right approach to parenting. 

For those parents who are interested, here are some eternal facts and parenting principles as in accordance to Vedic wisdom, which have been constant since times immemorial. 

Being a parent myself, I have also struggled with trying my best to nurture and guide my daughter so that I can do my duty as a parent faithfully. I have found the following points extremely beneficial.

Kindly find below, some excellent Vedic parenting tips, nicely summarized by Smt. Sunandaji daughter-disciple of Swami Parthasarathy:

1. Children have enormous amount of energy. They need a proper direction in life, that energy should not be curbed or stifled. 
Constant correction or attempts to discipline them do not help them in any way; it will eventually lead to strained relationship between parents and children. Parents need to learn to deal with that energy in positive manner and help the child to direct that energy. 
For example if active children are encouraged to develop active hobbies to channelize their energy (such as martial arts, dance, sports etc. according to their inclination) then they expend their energy and feel satisfied. Otherwise, such children who are not given a chance to direct their energy might feel cranky and frustrated. 

2. Every child has an inherent personality, which is called in Sanskrit as Swadharma (innate nature). This inherent personality should be understood by the parents by observing the child and parenting needs to evolve around the same. Each child is unique and it is parents' primary duty to understand their child's Swadharma so that they can guide, nurture and plan discipline strategies according to that. 
For example parent might perceive that one child is more sensitive, introvert, active, artistic etc. than their other child. Each child needs to be guided in a manner which facilitates their mental growth rather than curbing it. For example being too harsh with a sensitive child in matters of discipline, or forcing an artistic child towards arithmetic or vice versa will result in low self-esteem or rebellious behaviour in the child.
Thus parent ought to understand and support the innate nature of their child, instead of guiding him/her based on their own personal convenience, desires or whims & fancies.

As is also stated in Bhagwad Gita:
“Better is swadharma (one’s own duty) though devoid of merit than paradharma (duty of another) well discharged; better is death in swadharma, paradharma is fraught with fear.”


3. If you force children to do things, children will disobey and detest the correction. Therefore, it parents need to teach children by setting examples, not sermonizing to children. It is helpful to tell them the alternative rather than constantly telling them not to do certain things. 
For example rather than saying - 'Don't shout!", it is more effective to say - 'Please lower your voice/Please use a softer tone.' Explaining and educating the child about why certain behaviour is harmful or counterproductive also works better than simply imposing rules. 

4. Some of the important values which parents need to live up to, as good human beings are:
• to learn to give, rather than take
• to develop an unselfish attitude for others
• In any relationship, we need to do our duty towards others
Children are keen observers, they watch their parents constantly, thus parents need to introspect about their own behaviour as well.  



Link for the video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NYypQfgbdlE



8 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Thanks a lot Ashutosh ji, I am thankful for your kind remarks.

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  2. Very good Swati thanks for sharing. Keep it up.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for your comment, glad you liked the post.

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